My mum turns 60 tomorrow and it’s been a week of celebrations as my family have a crazy amount of December birthdays.
My mum is amazing and a great ‘SEN Nanna’ to H and our other boys.
Here are six (there wasn’t room for 60!) things we really appreciate about the way she cares for our family when particularly thinking of H’s needs.
- She is so positive about our boys and always looks for the good. I remember once when she told our middle son he was ‘such a good boy for finishing all his chocolate buttons’. I looked in disbelief and she said ‘your always telling him he hasn’t eaten enough let’s enjoy him eating well’! She makes our boys feel a million dollars and always finds the positive in them and our parenting. She’ll often say you’re doing well, put the TV on for them and make life easier for yourself!
- Caring for us as SEN parents makes a big difference! Bringing a meal, pudding or treat which saves us cooking or buying clothing and bits for the boys really helps. If they come for lunch they mostly bring it, serve it and clear up afterwards! Such a blessing.
- She often remembers appointments, dates and events. A text, check in of how it’s gone or a message to say she’s praying means a lot. It feels less isolating.
- My mum is busy but she still has time for us. She likes to go on holiday with us, do day trips and watch the boys grow. Some of these things we couldn’t do without them due to H’s needs so we are glad she enjoys it as much as they do!
- She tells me when I am not being reasonable! Sometimes the SEN parenting world requires fight and I can get myself ready for ‘battle’. She’ll sometimes say have you thought how they may feel, they are doing their best with little or not everyone gets it like you. Other times she’ll say ‘that’s not right or fair, make sure you say something!’
- She doesn’t get offended. Some of H’s ASD traits can be offensive. Not liking presents, asking to go home and him showing a strong preference for Papa in his younger years. She never pushed, complained or pressured for his attention and the patience paid off. It’s so relaxing for us as parents to know H and his brothers can be a lot less than perfectly behaved and she’s ok with that, expects it and still looks for the good.
She’s not perfect! This nanna journey she is on would not been the one she expected but she has fully embraced it.
Happy birthday mum/nanna thanks for all you do for our family, for loving my big H as your own, praying, supporting and championing.
Thanks also for having a bouncy castle at your party, a big chocolate cake you wouldn’t choose and making even your special day inclusive.